Satirical Letter Has Musk Offering Jensen Huang a Desk at Starbase

Jensen Huang Received an Olive Branch on His First Day After Being Laid Off

If Musk wrote a letter to Jensen Huang...

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Jensen,

So. You're free.

No condolences — you're not dead, and neither is CUDA.

This morning someone on X told me to hire you. I said "that would be an honor."

Now half the internet is writing my offer letter for me, so I might as well write it myself.

My week hasn't been great either. My election-interfering space lasers didn't work. Congress wants a chat. 🤷

But I'm not here to compare disasters. I've wanted you on my team for ten years.

2016: you carried the first DGX-1 into OpenAI. Five years of work, and the room was crickets.

Last October at Starbase you told me exactly one person cared that day. Me.

Nine years later you showed up again with a DGX Spark — 100x the compute per watt. I posted about it before your car left the lot.

In between: Colossus. 100,000 H100s, 19 days. You said it normally takes four years and only one person on Earth could do it.

You were wrong. Two people. You made the chips. I bolted the racks.

Three machines, one pattern: you build it; I plug it in. That's been running for a decade.

Btw, I don't care who any CEO sleeps with. I care whether the next rack gets power on time.

Also, I learned a Chinese phrase: 牛逼. You and CUDA are both 牛逼.

No need to translate that, everyone gets it.

So here's the offer. No title.

Titles are the least useful thing humans invented — apparently NVIDIA just created a brand new Chairman of the Board.

What I have is a desk at Starbase, unlimited power, and a rocket that needs to put a data center in orbit by 2027.

Star Mind was half-designed with your team. Somebody has to finish it.

You once said that if you were 30 again, you wouldn't start a company. Good. Don't.

Build the impossible half. Leave the spreadsheets to Colette — she's very good at them.

Physics doesn't care about boards, headlines, or this week.

Orbit has more room than Earth, and the cooling is free.

Old friends are the best friends. Jensen rocks.

Call me. Or don't. I'll be at the pad.

— Elon

P.S. It's windy. Bring a jacket. 🤷